How It Should Have Ended
by Rebal
Summary: Merlin has given everything to save Arthur and now Gwaine but the price must be paid all he has asked for is more time. Time to make sure Arthur is truly safe. However the time is drawing to a close and he will have to say goodbye to his King.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Gwen watched as her husband rode through the castle walls, followed closely by none other than Merlin and Gwaine. A roar rang through the castle, making Gwen smile. The sound was one Gwen now recognized as Perivale's. They were alive, her mind kept screaming at her. They had been gone for so long, she thought them dead, these thoughts kept her busy as she sprinted down the halls, not for the first time cursing her dress length as it trailed along the floor, and was certainly not meant for running in. As the double doors leading to the courtyard burst open and Percival and the other Knights of the Round Table came and joined her they greeted the long lost king. She ran down the stone steps and flung her arms around her husband as he swung off his horse. She was enveloped in his arms and she sobbed into his chest. When she could finally make a sentence she gasped,' your alive! Thank god your alive!'

The king turned to his best friend and his eyes sparkled, 'Its all thanks to Merlin.'

'I knew he would save you, his gifts wouldn't allow him not to.' she beamed at him, but Merlin looked dumbstruck as Arthur cried "You knew?"

'She guessed,' Gaius said finally joining the party who were welcoming the survivors.

Percival checked Gwaine over thoroughly.

"Your okay? I thought Morgana had…." He trailed off remembering the sound of his friend's screams.

'Merlin helped me.' All of the knights looked at one another, and Arthur said slowly, 'Merlin, you know you are going to have to tell them sometime.' Merlin looked at his King and nodded, but still he hadn't said a word. "Are you alright?"

Merlin nodded again with more force and swallowed, saying, "I'm just tried."

"Merlin you're going to have to tell me everything that happened, but first bed." Merlin looked at his mentor and relief and gratitude filed his eyes. Arthur saw this and understood immediately.

"Right, Merlin your going with Gaius and come and join us in the great hall when your ready, I've got a few changes to make and I need you to be there."

Merlin sat there on his horse letting the fact that he had safely returned Arthur and Gwaine back home. He couldn't seem to muster the energy to swing his legs off the horse and join the others. He knew he should be putting the horses away, but Arthur had already given them to another servant who was patiently waiting for Merlin's mare. Arthur wanted changes and he knew what they were. Arthur had accepted magic, and more importantly accepted him for who he really was Emyrus, the greatest Warlock in Albion. He was happy, ecstatic even, his destiny was fulfilled he hadn't failed Arthur. However the weight of the sacrifice given to bring back the lives of his two best friends from the brink of death had exhausted him, and the shadow of the ice cold voice still lingered in Merlin's head.

He felt a tug on his hand as Gwaine tried to get his attention, the rest of the knights were staring at him as well, "Huh?" he asked stupidly.

The king smiled cheekily at him, "You coming, idiot?"

Merlin finally pulled himself together and leapt off the horse. He steadied himself on Gwaine's resurging arm, which was wrapped securely around his waist. He gave his friend a thankful smile and started forward with the rest. That's when it happened, his vision tunneled and a blood rushed to his ears, his knees gave out and he crumpled to the floor.

Arthur had watched Merlin carefully, ever since he had poured more magic from himself, reviving Gwaine. It had been beautiful and mysterious, but Merlin had been tired and Arthur had seen his best friend become paler as they had rode back to the citadel. However his worries had fled as his arms were wrapped around his wife and Merlin's mentor had come on to the scene, there was nothing Gaius couldn't fix. Merlin would become his advisor and be rewarded for the loyalty and friendship he had given Arthur over the last ten years. As he watched Merlin swing of his horse and into Gwaine's awaiting arms he turned and followed his wife until he heard the unmistakable sounds of someone collapsing. He was instantly at Merlin's side calling his name as the colour drained from Gwaine's face. They locked eyes over Merlin's still form and Arthur saw that he had just come to the same conclusion he had.

Merlin heard the whispers from far away.

"Something is wrong." He instantly recognised the tight worry in the man's voice it was Gwaine.

"Gaius just said he was tiered, he used a lot of magic to bring us back."

"Arthur, Merlin barely said a word when we rode back to Camelot. Are you sure there wasn't a price to pay for bring people back from the edge of death? I believe you heard the voice just like I did." Gwaine said angrily.

There was silence for a long time as both realised that maybe there was more secrets Merlin had kept from them. The man listening finally felt himself slip back into consciousness just as Arthur whispered, "You know I'll always look after him, I always have, and this won't change anything. In fact making him courts sorcerer was no he never left my side."

A snort came from Gwaine, "you mean he has always looked after you?"

"It's my time to look after him, we know now everything he has done for me, for you and for the kingdom. Now it's our turn to make Merlin feel safe. Gwaine there is no one left Morgana's gone, were at peace, Albion is united."

Arthur strongly believed that peace had descended. He had quickly met with the round table, not wanting to leave Merlin's side for too long, incase he woke to find his friend not next to him. Merlin hadn't woken for nearly three days and worry was starting to seep into Arthur. He could feel it emanating from Gwaine as they watched their friend sleep, breathing evenly under the mountain of blankets Gwen had provided for him. Gaius said that he was just tired, and needed rest, however the question that kept ringing in his head was what the cold voice had meant. It had whispered and he had heard as he floating in the darkness. _I give them life, but all given life must come with a price. And the price must be paid young warlock._

Arthur had come back to consciousness with a start to find Merlin sobbing. He had soothed his best friend and that's when Arthur had seen Gwaine's still form in the clearing with them. Merlin had used magic to heal him, but he was so pale as he staggered to his horse to ride back to Camelot. Arthur and Gwaine had felt fine, great in fact, the soreness had vanished and he felt refreshed and alive. They had kept riding; Arthur wanted to see his kingdom and more importantly his wife. He hadn't noticed his best friend exhausted body struggling to stay on the saddle. He sighed feeling once again like the selfish prince who had first met Merlin all those years ago. Then Merlin stirred and Arthur was thrown back to the presence as Gwaine bounded to the edge of the bed with Arthur close at his heels.

Merlin opened his eyes. His vision was blurry and his body felt heavy. The first thing that he realised was that the room was not his own. It was far too grand and the four-poster bed he lay in was beautiful. The second thing he saw were his best friends peering down at him, worry etched on their faces.

"Are you okay?" He crocked barely able to get past the dryness in his throat; he coughed and gasped in pain. Arthur was instantly at his side soothing him.

"What's wrong?" he asked agitated. Merlin hid the pain well; he had learnt how to since the moment he had become Arthur's protector. So he smiled and asked for water. He knew what he was doing when he had given his life to his King and his best friend. He had asked for time, time to make sure that there were no more threats to Arthur, that he and his Queen were truly safe. But with this time came pain, the sacrifice would not be quick, but drawn out. Merlin knew he was willing to give anything just for sometime with his King, but Arthur couldn't know, couldn't be told until the last moment. The truth would crush him, and no one hurt his King, especially not Merlin, he was the savior and the comforter, not the other way around and Merlin would make sure of that. So as the glass of water was pressed to his lips and he looked into his King's eyes and saw the worry still rooted there, he swore to himself that he would take that away no matter what the price was.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It had been nearly a month since they had returned to Camelot. Merlin and Arthur sat on one of the turret building looking at the dark sky above. The month had been one of the best of Merlin's life, Camelot was at peace, and he had used the last of his magic to make sure it was kept that way. Being court sorcerer meant that Merlin had to stay at his King's side, however didn't have to do the chores he detested.

Arthur sat watching the stars as the breeze played with his hair. It was a beautiful mid summer night and Arthur, looking over the candle lit kingdom with his best friend besides him, realised why they were calling it the 'Golden Age.' He smiled to himself, Merlin and Arthur had become close, closer than they had ever been; the bond between them was strong, with no secret in the way, Arthur made sure they spoke about everything. The knights had accepted Merlin's magic just like Arthur had, apprehensive at first, but seeing Merlin's loyalty to his king could not hold a bad word against him. Gwaine was still saying that he had always known about Merlin's magic, and as Arthur started thinking about it, he _had_ noticed the narrow escapes. He blushed, as he realised he always thought it as providence or an angels listening to his prayers. He chuckled to himself as he looked at his best friend, Merlin the guardian angel.

"What you laughing about.' Merlin asked sleepily as he rested his head on the raised stonewall.

"I was just thinking about you being my guardian angel and how crazy it sounds."

Merlin smiled at him lazily, "You'd be dead without me."

"I know," he said seriously. Merlin had finally told Arthur everything after he had threatened, half jokingly, to put him in the stocks if he did not tell him about the magic over the last ten years. Hearing about his father's death had been the hardest part, but he understood, Morgana had always been one step ahead of them. Merlin was not to blame about the amulet; Arthur could also see how devastated the man was even after all these years.

Following that long night Arthur had made magic legal over his kingdom and embraced the druid's friendship. Camelot was truly shining in its Golden Age. The wizarding world was standing with Arthur, they were behind him and Albion was truly united.

The bell chimed midnight as Merlin yawned. They had been with Gwaine and the other knights in the tavern. After a few hours of mindless chatter and some magical party tricks from Merlin, where the whole tavern had joined in the excitement, Merlin began to feel lightheaded with joy, people where cheering him for something that had always kept repressed and hidden.

He had laughed with the rest of the knights and his king suddenly realising how content he truly was. He had told Gaius about the sacrifice and although his mentor kept looking for anything to help, Merlin already knew it was useless. At that moment though he didn't think about what was coming, he hadn't been this content and carefree since…. Well ever. He had his friends and magic was free, he had achieved his destiny. Magic was accepted and the druids would work with Arthur to keep it safe, he had spoken to them as Emyrus just to make certain.

Merlin awoke early the next day and went downstairs to get the King and Queen's breakfast. The sun was still rising above the mountains around the kingdom. It was going to be another beautiful summers day. Merlin hummed as he made his way back to the Kings chambers to find Peter, Arthurs new manservant, running past him, who froze staring at Merlin with the tray in his hands.

'I'm so sorry,' peter mumbled looking at his shoes, "I woke up late."

"Again?" Merlin asked with a raised eyebrow, but at peters weathered look he grinned. "You go to the kitchen and get yourself some breakfast I don't mind giving Arthur… I mean the King, his Breakfast." He remembered when he had started the job all those years ago and how hellish the mornings could be.

"Merlin, Thank you," Peter grinned and then without even thinking about he bowed to Merlin. Merlin stared but Peter just ran off towards the kitchen.

He kept reminding himself that he wasn't a servant anymore, but court sorcerer who slept down the hall from the King.

As Merlin barged through the Arthur's doors and noisily placed the King's breakfast on the table, Gwen smiled. Peter was great but it was nice to wake up to the sound of Merlin rustling around the room, while her husband grumbled abuse into his pillow.

Merlin drew back the curtains and streams of sunlight illuminated the bedroom, "Merlin!" the King wined.

"Yes sire?" he answered innocently. Gwen chuckled softly to herself as she gracefully left the bedroom to find her lady maids. After being Queen for five years she had finally become accustomed to being doted on, however she still liked to mend her own clothes and help Arthur whenever she could. She would not let herself be completely waited upon; it was not in her nature.

Arthur was secretly glad to find his Manservant, he meant, court sorcerer, waking him up. It had been their routine for ten years and Arthur missed it. He made sure that he kept Merlin close at all times, so not much had changed however the morning wake up calls were no longer by Merlin, but Arthur was glad to find him grinning wickedly as he opened the curtains wider to let sunlight stream over the bed.

When Arthur was finally dressed and eating with his wife, he pulled out a chair for Merlin, an invitation to sit down. Merlin looked startled at first but then tentatively took the seat next to the King. Arthur pretended not to notice the hesitation, however as Gwen spoke to Merlin about her day, Arthur thought about all the times he had wished he had shown his friendship a little more to the man who sat beside him grinning at the story Gwen was telling.

Merlin had felt fine the last month, and wouldn't have thought that his time was nearly up unless he had kept track of the days rushing past. He tried to cling to every memory and sitting with Arthur and Gwen as the sun illuminated the room was definitely one he would cling on to. As Peter came in to clear away the empty plates and Merlin followed Arthur down to the practice field he began to feel a burning sensation in his stomach. At first he tried to brush it off, however it grew worse and his vision began to black around the edges. He gripped the wall as his body instinctively curled upon itself. He couldn't think anymore as the pain traveled to his chest and he coughed violently.

Arthur was grinning widely and they made their way to find the rest of the knights. He couldn't remember smiling as much as he had over the last month. Merlin stopped abruptly and Arthur turned to make a jibe, but his smile fell as he saw his friend hunched over himself, gripping the wall for support. His face was screwed in pain and Arthur could see that he was shaking. His mind went blank in horror. Merlin had been fine they had been laughing a few minuets ago, but as Merlin coughed splattering blood on the wall, Arthur realised the calm, which had descended had finally given away to the storm.


	3. Arthur's Note

Hi Guys

Thank you so much for all of the great reviews I really appreciate it.

At the moment I am doing my course work so I probably wont write another chapter till the weekend, sorry.

But if you enjoyed this story please read the rest of mine at . and tell me what you think.

Thank you so much again.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Gwaine walked through the practice grounds talking to Percival; it was a beautiful day again, however storm clouds were rolling in fast from the west.

"We should probably go and see what's keeping Arthur," Gwaine said smiling.

"He's probably arguing with Merlin over some magical beast that Merlin wants to keep in the castle as a pet."

Gwaine laughed as they walked into the window lit corridor that led from the practice grounds to the main halls. "Yeah, do you remember that time with the baby… dragon? Was that what it was?"

"I have no idea, but it was cute, until it decided to try burn the castle down." They both laughed remembering how angry Arthur had been.

Gwaine was the first one to see Arthur, "Sire, Where have you…'he broke off suddenly seeing that Arthur was hunched protectively over someone.

Arthur turned to Gwaine and Percival, and they both froze. His face was a mask of terror, as he held his best friend in his arms.

"Help me!" he yelled. Both knights ran over to Merlin who was weakly trying to grip Arthur's shirt as he struggled to breath.

Arthur was desperately trying to think of what to do as Merlin gripped his shirt, his eyes begging for him to do something. And God, Arthur was trying to think, but no one was around and he would not leave Merlin alone.

He came back to the present as Gwaine yelled, "What should I do? Arthur, God tell me what to do."

Arthur held Merlin closer as another raking cough hit him and blood pooled from his mouth. This was one of those times when he hated being King, his brain had gone numb in terror and he had no idea what to do until one word came through the fog. "Get Gaius," he said realising that all he could do. "Get Gaius, Now!"

Gwaine sprinted down the halls to the physician's chamber his heart hammering in his mouth. His mind was screaming at him that his best friend was dying. Gwaine had been so caught up in the fact that Merlin had seemed better he forgot about the voice. The last month had been too perfect, everything had finally come together, but the man who had brought about this Golden Age was gasping for breath in on the stone floor in Arthur's arms.

As Gwaine sprinted away Arthur tried to sooth his friend telling him that everything was going to be okay. Merlin was always okay, he was a self-sacrificing idiot sometimes but he always came back, he was always at Arthur's side. Merlin's whimpers were becoming less frantic and that sacred Arthur, but as Merlin's eyes began to close Arthur gently shook him.

"No Merlin. Keep your eyes open. Look at me. Look. At. Me!" it was only then that Arthur realised that tears were streaming down his face. Leaving hot salty tracks, which burned Arthur's face. _No no no, _his mind screamed, _please god, please don't let him leave me.' _However the silent prayer was left unanswered.

Percival grasped Arthur's shoulders and Arthur nodded, he gathered Merlin in him arms; they needed to get him to Gaius. He would help; everything would be fine there would be some quest, some flower that would make everything better, he would not lose Merlin. Percival went to gather Merlin in his arms when Arthur stopped him with a shake to his head. He wouldn't let anyone touch Merlin until he was better; He lay unconscious in Arthur's arms his head resting on Arthur's shoulder. Merlin's breathing, he noticed, was coming in short shallow gasps, Arthur knew with a hollow sense of dread in the pit of his stomach that he didn't have much time left with his friend.

Arthur felt numb; as Gaius had told him there was nothing they could do. There was nothing left. Arthur felt worthless; he had never felt this pathetic in his life. Even when his father had died he had someone to blame, he had something to do. Merlin had helped him throughout it all. However as he stared dejectedly out at of the rain washed window, the grief that he had tried to keep at bay, broke. The iron hold gripped his chest and squeezed not allowing him to breath properly. A sob tore through him and he was grateful that everyone was gone apart from Gwen, who sat by his feet, they didn't say a word, there was nothing to say. Merlin was going to die.

Arthur sat by Merlin's bed as he heard the bell tower chime midnight. He looked at the deathly pale form of his best friend. Rage bubbled in his stomach until he felt like he was going to be sick. Arthur rose knocking the chair on the floor and almost screaming "God Damn it Merlin!" he paced trying to dislodge the suffocating feeling of grief. The rage left as quickly as it had come and he sagged slowly placing his chair gently back by the bed as tears clouded his eyes. He grabbed his friend's hand rubbing his thumb across Merlin's knuckles.

"Why…?" Arthur babbled, but he knew he had to do this; no rage would dislodge the grief that kept tightening as each minuet ticked past. "Why didn't you just let me and Gwaine go? Why did you have to put me through this… this agony. It was that voice wasn't it? You swapped the great Emrys' life for what? A King and a Knight? Merlin there will be thousands more Kings and knights but only one Emrys, only one… only one Merlin." He broke off as he bit his knuckle hard to stop the chest-shattering sob that wanted to burst free. "Only one you, only one best friend. I'm sorry I never said that before but do you remember that time when we were you went into the tunnels to distract Agravaine and I came back to find you, I meant it, I meant what I said. You really are my best friend and I can't bare to lose you. I'm so sorry you had to sacrifice everything for me, I would have never asked anyone to do that, but especially not you Merlin. You have always stood by my side giving me advice and saving my, what was it, oh yeah 'Royal Ass' and 'Dollophead." Arthur smiled remembering the easier times when Morgana was the best friend not the worst enemy. He sighed rubbing the back of his neck as he said "You haven't called me that for a long time. How did it go so badly wrong, Merlin? What did I do? I wish I had figured out about Agravaine when you told me. God I am so sorry Merlin, there are so many things I wanted to tell you, I wanted you to stand by my side with Gwen, be like a Knight but not in danger. Never in danger, you are never going out without armor again. I know you will complain, that its to heavy or some girly excuse like that," Arthur chuckling slightly, 'but I'm not hearing it you're my best friend and I will not lose you…" his voice choked off as he once again tried to keep check of his emotions. His voice was soft as he went back to stroking Merlin's knuckles. "You're my best friend but also more than that, you've become like a brother to me. When everyone betrayed me you were always there. Your magic, or 'strange feelings' as you used to call it, has saved my men countless times. But sometimes I wish I had seen things differently, seen things not through the eyes of a pompous prince or the king, but as your friend, as your brother, sooner than I have. I would have made you adviser straight away, but then again you have been my adviser, for the last six years now, even without the title." Arthur was quiet for a while just listening to Merlin's breathing and the fire crackling beside him until he finally whispered, "you can't leave me, not now. This Kingdom is at peace because of you, who will I turn to without you." Tears began to slice Arthur's cheeks again.

"I promise you will be okay, I've made sure of it." Arthur jumped at the sound of Merlin's voice his heart hammering.

"Merlin?" he asked gently not wanting to startle him. "Let me get Gaius, you must be in pain" Merlin shook his head, weakly grasping the hem of Arthur's sleeve.

"I'm fine, just stay with me."

Arthur nodded and sat back down plastering a smile to his face and asking lightly, 'who is going to write all my speeches now, and who is going to distract the cook so Gwaine and Percival can grab the last roast chicken."

"You knew" Merlin asked in mock outrage.

"There is nothing that goes on in this castle, Merlin, that I don't know about," Arthur said in the most king-like voice he could muster, and Merlin laughed and rolled his eyes.

"I should go and Gwaine he has been frantic, hasn't left this room until I ordered him to bed, they are all sleeping in the room next door."

"And Arthur Pendragon why are you not sleeping." Merlin asked weakly, but trying hard to look strong and imposing. Arthur's mood deflated as he said gently "I'm not leaving you side that's why."

"Arthur you have got to stop feeling guilty about this, it's not your fault and any way I'm only a ser…."

Arthur's eyes flashed dangerously as he grabbed Merlin's hand in his own "Don't you dare finish that sentence, you are not 'only a servant' you're my best friend my brother and the one that has stood by me through thick and thin for the last ten years, and now I'm not leaving your side until your well again." Merlin's eyes filled with tears as he heard the meaning in Arthur's voice. Merlin had known that Arthur cared for him, but didn't know how much until he saw the pain written all over his King's face.

"You will be a great King without me, you always have been. You are the once and future King, Arthur, the one who will be spoken about in centuries to come and still remembered as being the greatest ruler Albion has ever known."

"And that's thanks to you," Arthur said softly, as he saw Merlin's eyes droop close. "Sleep now we can talk about it in the morning."

Quietly so silently that Arthur could barely hear it Merlin whispered, "Thank you Arthur, for everything, we truly were two sides of the same coin, and for that I will be forever grateful."

**Sorry about all the angst. **

**Thanks again for all the reviews. there will be another 2, maybe 3 chapters left **

**hope you are enjoying it =D **


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 4

An anguished cry tore through the castle waking Gwaine. He sat up straight, _Arthur. _He was dressed and sprinting towards the physician's chambers before he was fully conscious of what he was doing.

Arthur woke slowly, when his mind suddenly shoved the last few days at him. He gasped and looked over to the deathly still body lying on the bed. His hand shook as he held Merlin's cold limp one.

"Merlin?" he asked softly, a lump already forming in his throat.

"Merlin!" Again there was no response. Merlin was still.

Suddenly the ice-cold voice echoed in Arthur's head, '_the price has been paid, Arthur Pendragon'. _

A cry tore through his throat. Merlin lay still, eyes closed almost as though he was still asleep. However Arthur knew Merlin wasn't waking up, there was no best friend to turn to, there was no one left who knew him as well as Merlin did. Tears slid down his face even as the door burst open, but he didn't try to hide his grief.

Gwaine stood staring at he scene. His stomach dropped with dread as he saw the still figure next to Arthur.

"Arthur we need to get Gaius!" but the King just shook his head, as he trembled with silent sobs.

"He's gone, there's nothing left to do, the payment's been made." Arthur crocked barely whispering past the lump in his thought, that wouldn't allow the tears to stop flowing. Gwaine suddenly grabbed Merlin's body roughly by the shoulders and shook him violently.

"You can't do this to me Merlin! I didn't get to say goodbye! Why would you do this! For God sake."

"Let go of him!" Arthur growled but Gwaine kept shaking their friend. "Gwaine I said let go of him, there nothing we can do." Gwaine did not even look up at the King.

Arthur stood and growled, "I said Let go!"

He gapped Gwaine and threw him on the other side of the room.

"Why were you with him and I wasn't? Why did you get to say goodbye and I didn't? He was as much your friend as he was mine!" Gwaine yelled. The pair looked at each other calculating, and then Gwaine swung his fist towards Arthur's face.

Arthur dodged the punch by centimeters but threw his own. The rage and grief was too much. However just as his fist was about to connect with flesh, he caught sight of the still figure lying on the bed and stopped. The fight left him and he just stared at his friend as tears poured down Gwaine's cheeks.

"Hit me!" he whispered quietly, "Please."

But the fight had left both of them, instead Arthur wrapped his arms around the Knight and friend as he sobbed.

Arthur and Gwaine set off for Eldor the next day. Arthur had thought it best to go and see Merlin's mother rather than sending a letter. He had been to Eldor a few times after the attack on the village and had become quite close to Hunith. Arthur was dreading the talk but he had to get out of the castle. Every corner he turned held memories. In his peripheral vision Arthur saw Merlin everywhere. The carefree grin that Merlin wore which, drove Arthur crazy, or so he pretended, was always there and it made his heart ache.

The sky was brilliant blue, and the birds sung in the trees, but the two men were morbidly quite, until Gwaine broke the silence.

"Thanks for letting me come with you. I kind of understand if you wanted to do this alone. Merlin was such a…"

"I know," Arthur said cutting him off. He gulped audibly but the suffocating sensation wouldn't leave. "Do you remember the time when Merlin went in front of the Drocha for me?"

Gwaine nodded saying, "He was such an idiot, always putting himself in front of danger and you, like that."

"Well I know why now, it was his role as Emrys."

"Arthur you know that's not why he did it. Merlin cared for you as much as you cared for him, don't belittle the sacrifice he made by saying it was for some prophecy, because we both know that it's not true."

Arthur gulped again as he rubbed his eyes. "You know the year after he became my manservant he told me he would be happy to be my servant until the day he died. At the time I was the arrogant selfish Prince of Camelot, if you can believe that?" he said grinning tearily at Gwaine as he chuckled.

"Really princess? I would have never have guessed."

"Anyway..." Arthur said still smiling, "I didn't think anything of it then, but now looking back, he gave me hints all the time, even when I yelled at him for not serving me. He told me countless times that he was in the tavern, when I know as well as you do, that Merlin relay went there and when he did it was always with you or me. I don't understand why I didn't realise beforehand. There was this one time where Merlin vanished for a long time and when he came back he told me, _told me _that the reason he wasn't there was because he was dying! And I thought he was joking."

"Arthur you couldn't have…"

"Gwaine I was with him all the time, I should have known. I should have realised that my best friend was risking his life on a daily basis. And then again that time a few months ago when Gwen was under Morgana's spell. I knew something was wrong when Merlin vanished that time. I know this sounds thick, but it was when Gwen said 'you have far more important things to worry about.' I knew then, somehow, that this was not the woman I had married. Gwen would have shoved me out of the door and followed me to look for him. Merlin finally told me what happened and, oh God Gwaine, we should have been there, I don't know what would have happened if that boy hadn't helped him. That's twice Merlin was poisoned because of me, if I had known I wouldn't have let him out the castle, though he'd probably have found some other way to hurt himself!"

"Arthur you have got to forgive yourself there was nothing you could have done. You were both born to look after one another and that's what you did."

Arthur was silent for a long time as the horses strode closer to Eldor at a leisurely pace.

Finally he spoke, "Gwaine, he did so much for me, and I never wanted to show him how much he meant to me. It was my father's fault he always accused me of caring for my _manservant too much,_ but he meant everything to me, he was my only friend until the round table came to be, and the ironic thing is that they wouldn't have come together if not for Merlin."

"You two were close, Arthur he was the best friend you ever had, and he was the best friend I ever had as well. You two truly were the two sides of the same coin."

Arthur whipped around starling Gwaine, "That was the last thing he said to me before he closed his eyes. He used to write all of my ceremonial speeches, did you know that? Those words were mine, but written by Merlin, he was always my adviser I just could never see it."

The men were silent for a while and as the sunset. Soon they could make out the small village of Eldor, as the horses trotted down the hill towards Hunith's house Arthur Whispered

"Do you think the pain ever goes away?" He hated admitting weakness but this pain was so intense sometimes he could burly breath.

"I don't think it will ever go, but it will get better."

As the candles were lit, the two horses walked though the dark village and Arthur whispered, "I miss him so much."

Gwaine watched Arthur hold Merlin's mother close as she sobbed into his chest. He sat by the window as the wings of dawn spread across the lightening sky. Seeing this scene made his heart ache, after his family's death Merlin was the closet thing to a brother he had ever found. Merlin had always been there, a force that he could always relay on. A steady stream of fresh tears decorated his cheeks as he watched another day dawn. What Gwaine really wanted to know was if Merlin was happy to give his life for his? He understood Arthur's life, but he was King and Merlin's best friend, no Merlin's brother, but Gwaine? Gwaine was the one that was always saved by his friend. Merlin had brought him to Camelot and made him a knight. However to repay him he had betrayed his King and friend, then had been saved through Merlin's magic, but the price to pay was too much. The great Emrys was gone and Gwaine would have to live with that for the rest of his life.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Arthur could see through the window that the knights were building a prier for their friend's body, but the King wasn't ready to let go just yet. He took a deep breath and walked into the dark room. His hand once again searched for Merlin's in the dark. He sat there in silence for what felt like a long time. Merlin was back in his old room, in the physician's chambers, Arthur looked around the room that held so many memories, as he took a shaky breath and began to speak before he could lose his composure and flee.

"When I lay dying, before you sacrificed everything, I told you thank you for all you had done, but you have done so much more than I ever realised. I've got so much to thank you for, there is so much that you have taught me, but the most important thing that you showed me was what it is to have a great friend who is loyal and will sacrifice…" Arthur swallowed and wiped his eyes. "I mean did sacrifice everything for me and the kingdom." There was silence as Arthur just stared at his friend's body, for what he knew was the last time.

"I keep thinking I'm going to wake up to find you opening those bloody curtains every morning…" Arthur weakly chuckled, "but that's not going to happen anymore is it?"

Arthur stared at his friend as the sun began to set outside the window. He squeezed Merlin's cold hand affectionately before he made his way down to the funeral.

The knights stood in the courtyard and bowed their heads, as Arthur placed the burning flame on to the pyre. Gwaine stood next to him as they watched the red knights cloak, which was wrapped around their friend's body, burn. Gwen clutched his arm tightly as she forced back the sobs, but Arthur just stared at the flames. He felt numb as Merlin's laugh echoed in his minds eye and he knew he would never forget the bond the two of them had shared.

However Arthur knew this was the end to a great man who had showed him so much. He vowed then he would return to the lake Albion every year to see his best friend and the word of the great Warlock, Merlin, would forever live on. There names would never be separated and the golden age of Camlet would be remembered till the end of time, as the one who brought about this golden era was just a servant who became much, much more.

'Daddy?' a small voice whispered. The king looked up from his piece of parchment, which he had been reading by candlelight.

"Yes, my son?" The blue eyed, raven-haired boy looked up to his father with the same awe and worship all six-year-old boys have for their fathers. His father's heart squeezed as he realised how much he looked like his once protector.

"Can I stay with you? I had a bad dream." Arthur pushed the parchments away and got up to kneel before his son. He lifted him easily and started for the boy's bedroom.

"Did you. Well nothing is going to hurt you, your safe, Mummy and Daddy are just here to protect you."

"Can you tell me the story about my uncle again." It had been nine years since his warlock had left a hole in his life. Arthur had always known one side of a coin could not live without the other, yet Gwen, the Kingdom and his son needed him. Nevertheless once a year Arthur would make the journey to the lake of Albion, alone, to try and be close to his friend once more.

As Arthur sat on his son's bed and retold the story of the brave man, who protected a stubborn Clotpole of a Prince, his son's eyes began to close. Arthur slid off the bed and blew out the candle before kissing his son's forehead whispering, "Goodnight Merlin."

And left the room to find his wife.

**So thats the end **

**so sorry it didn't have a happy ending and also sorry that it took so long to publish. I have been away and I wanted to make the last chapter good and not just something quick. So although it is short it took a long time to make right. **

**Thank you everyone who commented I really appreciate it. **


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